Intersecting Grief

My tree was already blue for this season but fits this week especially.

Every day something sorrowful happens in our world - the loss of someone dear. Sometimes, it’s a senseless act of violence, or an unexpected tragedy. Sometimes, a decline in health that couldn’t be stopped. The list goes on . . . 

This week, the community around me is aching after a local police officer was shot and killed while on duty. A large memorial is taking place today at the arena near my office. It’s a BIG deal and the grief of all of it weighs heavy on the community, the officer’s family, friends and many members of law enforcement especially.

My heart is heavy too, and as I walked by the arena today, I prayed that God would comfort and surround the people there as they mourn and celebrate a life of this man, this leader who served our community selflessly.

Earlier in the day, I heard someone say, “It’s a sad day for Fayetteville.” My immediate thought was, “But every day is sad for me.” Then, my next thought, “That feels selfish, this isn’t about me.”

But is it? Is it selfish to think how this story intersects with my own grief process? My initial thought is true, most days without Josh are sad. And now, more people are sad because of another big loss that impacts them personally. I can feel the heaviness of their grief along with my own.

My story of loss is different than this one, but the heartache remains similar, making it hard (seemingly impossible) to participate in another service or memorial. Yet, I still want to yell out to the family and this hurting community, “I see you and understand a piece of the heartache you are experiencing.”

Yes, our family and friends had some time for goodbyes, more hugs and kisses, but we were never really ready for THAT day - the big one. 

I post this today, hopefully without selfish ambition, to say to those honoring and remembering Officer Stephen Carr, “I stand with you and I am praying you see God’s great love and comfort somehow in this.”

#LightTheCityBlue413

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